Shoes: Christian Louboutin • Skirt: Nordstrom • Top: Banana Republic • Necklace: Gjenmi • Earrings: J.Crew • Watch: Michele • Cuff: David Yurman • Ring: David Yurman • Gold Cuff: Stella and Dot • Handbag: Celine (similar style here)
As we lean into this week, I’ve had a lot on my mind. Yesterday, March 25th was Palm Sunday, my grandma’s birthday and my supposed due date (This is going to be the last time I talk about this, but I felt that this blog post would be the way we close this chapter of our life). I’ll be honest – I’ve still been feeling that peace I felt the day we found out – and right now, we have pure understanding and faith in knowing the Lord’s got this. But yesterday, my mind was filled with thinking about Jesus, my grandmother (who’s no longer with us) and the child that the Lord put in our lives for a small amount of time. Honestly, I swear He planned this timing to be right around Easter – (next to Christmas!) my favorite holiday and when Jesus sacrificed His life for us. It’s honestly made me really reflect on this life we live and how we handle hard, broken situations that get thrown at us – that we have no idea how to comprehend – I firmly believe that in those situations, the Lord is teaching you something and wants you to course correct.
And here’s where my heads at right now – I only want the Lord’s plan for my life – nothing else. He called me to be a mother 9 months ago and put that role on pause – for a minute. As I reflect on the last 9 months, my growth at my marketing job accelerated, Chuck and I have been fortunate enough to do house projects that we want to do, and I’ve been able to spend every ounce of my spare time with Chuck, my family, and my girlfriends. We have so many wonderful memories we’re making and planning to make this year – between more babies (yay! I just love aunt life), weddings, and 30th birthdays – this year is packed. And I’m so so SO grateful that I get to focus every part of my being on those moments.
This situation in my life has really helped me show pure courage – I always used to think, ‘Just because someone is going through something tough, doesn’t mean they have to put that on someone else.’ And when this happened, I immediately thought – I will never put this on anyone – this is between Chuck/I and the Lord – no one else. I truly believe that if you have been broken or been threw a storm in your life but still have the courage to be gentle to others, you’re a badass. He has a reason, He has a plan for Chuck and I’s life, and we are so grateful and at peace knowing that.
As I look back on the last 9 months – there isn’t one thing I’d change. And I’m gonna be straight – I can be an anxious person about things, but this situation has completely depleted the anxiety I had prior to getting pregnant. And to me, this situation happened because the Lord wanted me to course correct – and ladies and gents – it worked.
Now – with Easter just days away, the only thing that comes to mind is – Gratefulness. Grateful for this absolutely perfect life that the Lord provided – grateful for my Chuck, my family, my friends, my job, my health – and all because Jesus sacrificed His life so that I could have these riches.
Ladies – those of you who are going through or have gone through a similar situation – please know you are not alone. And through Faith, you can get through this.
With love, Lauren